Frequently Asked Questions
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What is childhood trauma and abuse?
Childhood trauma and abuse stem from the negative impact of the actions of others on/with children. Trauma is not limited to only physical abuse like sexual assault, molestation, or fondling; it also encompasses physical violence against children like hitting, spanking, punching, pushing, and beating. The impacts of child abuse also come from passive abuse like narcissistic behaviour from adults, being talked down to, shaming, having right taken away, and being scolded or punished for healthy child-like behaviours.
Child abuse and trauma can also come from adults failing to act in ways that protect children. Abuse cause injury, death, emotional harm, or risk of serious harm to a child. There are many forms of traumatic childhood experiences, including neglect and exploitation.
An approximated 70% of adults in the world have encountered at least one traumatic event in their life that has forever influenced them. Some of these events are child abuse, domestic abuse, deaths, accidents, and mental, emotional, unwanted touch, and physical traumas.
I know what I should be doing, but I can't seem to be able to take the first step. Why?
This is a great question and the #1 reason that I mentor Trauma Warriors around the world, why are you stuck and how can we get you to overcome? Being held in The Vortex is the reason that you are not fully enjoying your potential and living the life that you want. The first step is possible once you understand the practical and real-life ways that you take that step.
My childhood had so much trauma and abuse that no one can help me. How can you?
As a coach for adult survivors of child abuse, I think it would be a huge injustice to you if I didn't have trauma. I am a survivor of child abuse. My story is not that different from many thousands of people in the world. I was raised by several people growing up, both inside and outside of my family. when I was sent to live with a new caregiver in the city, during that time play was not allowed. My daily routine consisted of chores and homework and I was not allowed to speak when the adults were talking unless I was spoken to. My chores increased significantly when the wife of my caregiver suddenly passed away. I started cooking, cleaning and taking care of my younger sister, I also became quiet. I was focused on my tasks, protecting my sister, covering school work and avoiding beatings. The last caregiver I had before reuniting with my mother was an alcoholic who owned a bar in the compound we lived in Kumba, Cameroon. She promised Mom she would take good care of us and once Mom was gone, she turned me into a mini house manager at 13. For the next three years, I cooked, cleaned, sold in the bar, managed her money, worked hard for school, and took care of my sister and other children this woman had in her care.
What's the difference between a therapist and a trauma and abuse coach and mentor?
Therapists will typically concentrate on pain areas of the past, use a passive/non-active way, look at things through a diagnostic or medical approach, and fit you into a predestined model. Therapy also takes a significant amount of time and devotion. Finding real efficiency in therapy can take years and even decades. Finding the right therapist plays a crucial role in a restorative manner.
As a child abuse mentor and coach, my focus is on very crucial and critical areas:
- Identification - Collectively we'll find what is holding you.
- Empowerment - I will help you reveal the tools to empower yourself and answer your queries and create solutions through knowing yourself.
- Future - We will design the future you want by planning a road map and vision of what you deserve.
- Possibilities - We will open up the world to your potential and talent.
- Self-discovery - We will take a deep dive into who you are, where you want to go and how to get there.
- Inner work - We'll explore the exact inner functioning of who you are.
- Practices - Through mindset and awareness modalities we'll get you reconnected to yourself
- Measurable results - You will grow through tracking progress, creating measurable and achievable goals, and concentrating on the No Excuses Just Results mentality
- Time frame - My purpose is not to keep you as a client for life. If that happens, then I have failed at my role as a childhood trauma coach. My mission is to get you out on your way by living the life that you want as soon as possible. For some Trauma Warriors, this may take a couple of sessions for others a couple of years.
How long have you been a coach and mentor for adult survivors of child abuse?
I have been sharing my story and guidance for a couple of years now. In that process, I have guided many people to a better understanding of themselves. It has been through the process created that they have been capable to turn dreams into reality.
What is the biggest challenge that you have overcome in your own life outside of being an abuse coach and mentor?
Owning myself. Stepping into my potential and becoming who I truly am is the hardest thing I have ever done. Surviving child abuse was easier than becoming me.
What type of adult survivors of child abuse and trauma do you work with the most?
I work with Trauma Warriors who are ready to do whatever it takes no matter what to get their lives back. I only work with people who are willing to do EVERYTHING in their power to reach their most magnificent potential and become the person that they know they are. The road is not easy, and I will support you all the way, but you have to be willing to support yourself more.
How would you describe your method as a trauma mentor and coach?
My approach is straightforward. I will come at you with complete honesty, understanding, and non-confrontational communication. I am not here to scare you into submission so that you become your highest self. I am here to support your journey from abuse to HERO in any way that I can. I will not sugarcoat anything so you must indeed be ready to take your power back!
Do you offer online trauma and abuse mentorship and coaching?
Yes. I work primarily online. By special arrangements, I can schedule in-person Trauma Coaching sessions if we are in the same city.
What will happen in the trauma coaching sessions that I have with you?
Our sessions are based on your needs, and each session will be different as we recognise your pain points, triumphs, successes, and road map to success. We'll check in, reference our game plan, and talk about what's working and what's not on your mission. Ultimately, the time we spend together is space held for you to continue your journey to healing, happiness, and sustainability after childhood trauma.
What can I expect from you after our sessions?
Every Trauma Warrior has a different need. The work that we do is fully customizable to suit your healing journey. Some request multiple weekly check-ins, and for others, our weekly meetings are sufficient.
I'm still not sure if I need a trauma recovery life coach and abuse mentor. How else can I know?
- Are you easily triggered and don't know why?
- Are you unhappy with the state of your life?
- Are you still impacted by child abuse in ways that keep you from being happy?
- Do your behaviours negatively impact the people around you?
- Do you feel out of touch with reality?
- Do you think about giving up?
- Are you missing the clarity and feel like you are stuck?
- Is everyday life and the little things a struggle?
- Are you lost in seeking a purpose?
- Do you feel trapped in memories of abuse and trauma?
- Is getting out of bed the thing you dread the most?
- Do you feel like you are not living up to your full potential?
- Do you have flashbacks from traumatic events?
- Do you self-sabotage?
- Do you find yourself not feeling worthy of love and companionship?
- Is everyone around you telling you that you need to seek help?
- Have you read all the self-help books and nothing has changed?
- Do you get easily distracted and lose focus?
- Do you blame others for your mistakes and shortcomings?
- Are you struggling with your self-image?
- Have you lost jobs or relationships because you aren't giving them you're all?
- Do you feel entirely unfulfilled with everything you do?
- Is your mental and physical health failing?
- Do you feel like you have tried everything?
- Does it feel like the weight of your trauma and abuse is still haunting you?
- Do you feel disconnected from reality?
- Do little things piss you off?
- Are you subject to fits of rage and anger?
- Do you always not feel "good enough" or worthy?
- Do you seek validation from others?
- Are you unorganized?
- Is your self-esteem tied to drugs, sex, or alcohol?
Is having a child abuse and trauma life coach worth it?
That is for you to determine. There are millions of adults aimlessly roaming with no real guidance as to why they can't control their habits, vices, emotions, and feelings after undergoing childhood trauma. Some Trauma Warriors want more from their life than dying with the question of "what if"
Trauma healing life coaching and mentoring can increase your quality of life, boost your self-confidence and self-esteem, happiness, enjoyment, understanding, attitude, and energy. In addition, you may find your levels of stress, anxiety, depression, and ideations will slowly if not completely dissolve over time.
What areas of trauma and child abuse do you focus on?
I focus less on the abuse and trauma itself and more on how to understand and navigate the impacts. I am a resolution seeker meaning that much like algebraic equations I am also looking to solve for the hidden variable. What is it that is keeping you stuck? Why do you lie, cheat, steal, hurt yourself, hurt others, self-sabotage, and ruin your life? Not only do I help you understand those questions without judgment, but I also help you form a plan of attack in passing through them.
Are there areas that Child Abuse Coaches and Mentors that don't focus on?
There are not a lot of areas that I am afraid to approach with the Trauma Warriors I work with. I treat each person on a case by case basis and customize the work that we do around specific needs. If I feel that I cannot successfully help you navigate what you need assistance with or find a solution, then I will help you find someone that can.
Should I hire you as my cPTSD life coach, so I get over my trauma and abuse?
The short answer is only if you are ready to commit to change. The reality is that if you are not:
- Ready to be emotionally vulnerable
- Face the challenges ahead
- Willing to stop making excuses
- Committed To your greatness
- Brutally honest with yourself
- Open to the fact that change doesn't come overnight
- Accepting that there is no magic pill to heal trauma
- Ready to face your biggest fears of self
- Willing to be held accountable in a way you never have
- Open to taking action that will change your life
- Committed to investing whatever it takes into yourself
Why did you decide to become a life coach and mentor for child abuse?
I tell people this all the time, and I mean it when I say that I didn't sign up for this job. No part of me ever imagined a day when I would be helping other survivors of child abuse find their way out of The Vortex, but it is truly my calling. I want others to know that if I can make it then so can they. Childhood trauma does not have to control us!
What do you love about mentoring and coaching people who survived childhood trauma and abuse?
The best moment for me is when someone tells me that I have given them the tools that have changed their life. There is nothing more fulfilling than knowing that someone has been provided to fully own who they know they are. The thing I love the most about mentoring Trauma Warriors is when they no longer need my help.
What is the process behind Trauma and abuse coaching?
The system I developed is a 6 stage process:
- Understanding the foundation of trauma and how it impacts you
- Diving deep into who you are
- Challenging yourself and identifying who you want to be
- Creating a plan of attack
- Naming the hidden parts of you and battling your shadow
- Implementing a plan to stay the course
You keep saying The Vortex. What does that mean to abuse survivors?
Let's schedule a call and dive in! Click here to schedule your FIRST call.
How do I know if you are the right trauma and PTSD mentor for me? If we don't match?
I am not for everyone, and everyone is not for me. I look at the work that we do together as an energy exchange, and you have to be willing to give your all so that I can do so in return. We have to have the right connection, short term and long term goals, and willingness to dedicate ourselves to the same path to be successful.
My job as a trauma coach and mentor is about giving you every single tool at my disposal to ensure your success in life. As a coach for adult survivors of child abuse I have dedicated all of my resources to personal development, mental and emotional growth, understanding human behaviour and why we do what we do, mindfulness practices such as meditation and visualization, wellness habits including diet and exercise, personal training, and human psychology focused on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Gestalt practices to give you every advantage!
I have dedicated countless years, finances, and resources to healing my trauma and abuse. What you are left with is an opportunity to take advantage of the victories and successes, lessons, and mistakes that I have made and learned from.
My mission is to be the catalyst to success in your trauma healing journey. I am an advocate for your purpose, and as your advocate, I care about your well-being and have your best interest and success in mind.
I am emphatic, compassionate, kind, caring, intuitive, insightful, perceptive, practical, grounded, supportive, reliable, bold, honest, resourceful, understanding, trustworthy, and professional so that you can be those things for yourself.
I may not be the right Trauma Coach for you, and that's OK. Let's start with a call to find out.
Can trauma and abuse coaching sessions be rescheduled?
There are always circumstances in which reschedules are needed.
How much are trauma and abuse coaching and mentorship with you?
We will discuss all the details on our first call, which is at no cost to you. Click here to schedule your call and discover how I can help you take your life back!
Are you ready to be the hero of your own story? What else will you do as my child abuse and trauma recovery life coach and mentor?
- Help you explore the vulnerable sides of your wants, needs, and interests
- Give you the ability to clarify what you expect from yourself
- Ask you provoking questions to challenge your thought process
- Equip you with the tools to face your fear
- Show you how to remove distractions and focus
- Teach you how to rewards yourself
- Support you on your journey to self-discovery through trauma
- Help you identify emotional triggers and how to navigate them
- Take you through self-identifying exercises
- Teach you how to create gratitude despite trauma and abuse
- Give you support in setting goals and reaching them
- Discover how to do things that are in your best interest
- Break old patterns and negative self-talk
- Identify problem areas and create plans to disrupt them
- Give you feedback
- Teach you how to be self-sufficient
- Guide you to intrinsic motivation
- Give you a baseline to build on
- Become more confident
- Establish life plans and actionable tasks
- Increase your productivity
- Decipher the impact of child abuse and trauma on you
- Learn how to be calm in the face of adversity
- Give you the space to be heard
- Teach you how to not give up on yourself despite the trauma
- Learn a new perspective and why child abuse has interrupted your processes
- Guide you to self-belief
- Teach you accountability for yourself
- Guide you to moving through trauma and abuse
- Show you how to interrupt self-sabotage
- Learn how to stop procrastinating
- Release negative thoughts and use them as fuel
- Get out of your comfort zone
- Assist you in the trauma healing process
- Help you get out of your head
- Teach you how to manifest and take action
- Find solutions to everyday problems
- What are the other benefits of having a trauma life coach and mentor?
- Increased clarity of who you are and where you are going
- Finding ways to get more results in life, business, and relationships
- Creating new avenues of focus
- Dramatically improve the quality of your expectation of life
- Increase real and measurable productivity
- Learn to become outgoing and social
- Set goals and accomplish them
- Decipher decisions that impact you
- Mastery over your mindset
- Learn how to overcome obstacles and objections
- Tap into self-motivation
- Decide what success means in your life
- Develop sustainable habits
- Lower stress, worries, and anxiety through mindfulness and other practices
- Discover how to be empowered and take control over your trauma
- Find peace
- Overcome fears of love and companionship
- Experience happiness
- Exchange bad behaviors through acceptance and self-love
- Create manageable and measurable progress
- Learn to love yourself